CONFUSED?!

Bakit ganoon, ang dami dami kong naiisip na bagay ngayon? Dahil ba wala akong kausap? Dahil ba wala akong masabihan ng problema ko? Siguro oo, na naging resulta kung bakit nagawa kong isulat ang mga pangungusap na ito na dapat pala ay dati ko nang na’realize.

Wala naman mali, pero bakit parang hindi na tama ang lahat. Dahil ba may hinahanap ako na hindi ko makita sa kanya? Hindi naman ako ganito dati. Bakit hindi naaayon ang nararamdaman ko sa situation? Bakit parang ngayon ko lang naiisip ang realidad na dati ay isinantabi ko lang? Dahil ba may isang tao na nagpamulat sa maling mga desisyon na nagawa ko noon? Pero bakit dati, may mga taong halos iumpog na ulo ko dahil sa pagka-martyr ko ngunit isinawalang bahala ko lang ang mga payo nila? Hindi naman ako nagsisisi sa mga pagpapatawad na nagawa ko, pero bakit pakiramdam ko- “It’s TOO MUCH”. Isa, dalawa, tatlo. Tatlong beses ko binigyan ng isa pang pagkakataon na maitama niya ang lahat ng mali. Pero kakayanin ko pa ba ang magkaroon ng pang-APAT? May mga tao ba talagang mapangabuso kung kaya hindi na sila natututo sa mga maling ginagawa nila dahil alam nilang in the end, mapapatawad sila sa kanilang nagawang kasalanan?

Naisip ko, paano kung nabaligtad na ang mga sitwasyon. Na ako ang nanloko. Kaya rin ba niyang magpatawad katulad ng pagpapatawad ko? Kaya niya rin bang magpaka-martyr kagaya ko? Maging pikit mata kahit alam niyang ang sakit sakit na? Isa, dalawa, tatlo. Kaya rin ba niyang magpatawad kung sakaling nagkamali ako?

Puro ako tanong pero wala ako makuhang kasagutan.

Pero may isa akong taong gustong pasalamatan. Dahil sa kanya, namulat ako sa realidad ng buhay. Para sayo, SALAMAT! <3

Anay tanga? ANET?! Wahahaha! Ang drama ko! Anyway, nagawa ko lang ‘to because boredom.

MiTCHiE <3

Just Another Problem

I have this problem..well, maybe I’m just making it a problem. Anyway, I have this friend.. (maybe not) but I know a very very dirty secret of him.. Well, I know he wouldn’t read my blog so I will tell about it..He was a murderer of 2 guys I think. I know that I have to keep this secret because he might do something deadly on my side. But I can’t, I should keep my mouth shut. What I feel now was full of fear. Every time I talk with him makes my flesh cold. He had a very innocent face that you wouldn’t believe what he did..

If you will ask about, and who he is…I’m telling you that I will keep silent. For the reason that I got only these informations from a friend. I have no right to spread this issue without knowing the whole story. It is just a bit info’s that might be true or not.

How to make your Adventure prepared?

People loves to travel and adventure some places but doesn’t appreciate when they arrive on the place. These are some ways to make your escapade more exciting, prepared and fun:

1. First, bring your camera along with your things. You would love to take photos on the most beautiful scenes. Show them to your friends to influence them to also visit the place. Just make sure you have enough battery and films.
2. Foods and snacks when hunger strikes. There are some places where they have no available stores so better bring some snacks. You’ll hate adventuring when your tummy aches.
3. Bring xash rather than cards. Money is cery important so better bring cash. There are some stores who doesn’t accept credit cards so for assurance handle your wallet w/ money.
4. Finally, try to smile and laugh to enjoy the trip. Your emotions can help to enlighten your aura so try to avoid being a crap! Appreciate everything you see by giving a smile.

Another Strong EVE

With her stylish sunglasses paired along with dangling earrings, a woman crossed the road not with her legs but by using her knees and hands.  That was the scene when I first saw that woman. I can still feel how I felt that time- pity, admiration, and sympathy. It still aches when I imagine the feelings of how the rocks touch her bare skin, and thinking that in her everyday living she will not be capable to walk normal. I wasn’t able to ask her how she felt every time people tease her because I was afraid she would reject me. But when I got the opportunity to know her, I really admired her for being so strong and confident in spite of her situation.

I had a hard time to look for her when I went to her house because according to the people around, she is dropping by other houses that really amazed me. I was expecting she is the kind of woman who only walks around the four corners of her house but not. When I got the chance to find her, she first gave me a coy smile for the reason that it was the first time that we met each other. I felt a bit shy because she was kneeling on the ground while I’m sitting on a chair that also made me the situation uncomfortable. Her name is Eva Garcia, a woman diagnosed in a disease called Polio for her 34 years of living. According to her, her abnormality was from a genetic history but her case is more awful. The left of her body portion is alive but the right part is numb. She compared it like stroke but thankfully her head was spared. When she said that, I observed her and I felt pity of witnessing the comparison between the left and right part of her body. It was like a see-saw that will never be levelled equally.  As our conversation goes, I was expecting tears falling on her cheeks but instead I saw a proud smile as she told how she accepts her condition. She believes it was a gift of God because in her 34 years of walking using her knees, she hadn’t been a patient of hospitals and she hadn’t experienced wounds.

Eva is a good example that will give you full inspiration. She is working for her daily living because there is no one who can support her needs. A brochure of selling products became her butter and bread. She had admitted that in her situation, there are so many limitations in everything she wants to do. At that time, I saw a transformation of a smile to a sad one. Even she doesn’t say a word; I can feel how upset she was.

As of the moment, she is hoping against hope. She still believes that one day, God will lead her to a better person.

Haiku

A perfect summer day is when the sun is shining,

the breeze is blowing, the birds are singing,

and the lawn mower is broken.

James Dent

Sunny Side Skin

Sunny summer heat,

Ignites my bare skin within,

Cherishing moments…

Autumn is a second spring when every leaf’s a flower.

Albert Camus

The New Beggining

Bicycles Chasing,

Following the leaves falling,

Autumn is starting…

I like these cold, gray winter days.  Days like these let you savor a bad mood.

Bill Watterson

Agonized Alone

Icy peaks,

Hanging on the roof,

I’m longing…

Academic Noise SUCKS!

We’ll this would be the first time I would use the word SUCK in my blog. It is my own opinion regarding with our recent workshop we attended at De la Salle University in Lipa. I was accompanied with my co-officers in class and other CEAS class officers. In fact, not only Lyceum but other universities in CALABARZON attended the workshop.  The workshop was called “ACADEMIC NOISE” and no one had any idea what was the workshop all about.  But all of us were so excited because we thought the workshop was interesting.

The moment we arrived at the university, we heard the bombarding noise coming from the sentrum. It was created by different electric guitars and such instrument. We guessed that the workshop was full of noise, like what the theme said, “ACADEMIC NOISE”. We waited for about an hour before the program started and we had some time observing our surrounding. Because the place was foreign to us, we felt quite uncomfortable. So, the program started and hours went thought that we still don’t know what’s the purpose of that workshop. We spent 50 pesos for nothing. The organizers were not prepared and the program was a total MESS!

Let me describe you what was scene of that workshop. The guy’s were explaining what they were doing using foul words. Though I use those words too but I think it’s not appropriate that within a formal workshop you will be using it. They acted as if they were drunk or over dosed with drugs. (Sorry for the terms used but this is my own opinion). They didn’t execute the answers properly as students tried to ask them questions. And even the host, her voice was not good to listen to. Everything was such a big CRAP!

We just wasted about 120 pesos for nothing. It only resulted a headache for all of us. I thought I was deaf after that workshop. Those sound they created marked a bad image of De La Salle to me. You can even ask the professors who joined also that they also didn’t enjoyed the workshop. It was not proper that they use such words like, “No salvation” and “P@ta&*in#”. Shame on them, it is a catholic school yet they allowed such seminars like that. As if they were a member of “Culto” and encouraging us to join them. I could compare the sentrum as a horror house that time. They were like hypnotizing us.

Again, this was just an opinion regarding that workshop. “Walang personalan”.

Sublian Escapade

People grow, and people change but our cultures doesn’t fades even decades had passed. It was made more rich, beautiful and exciting because it reflects who we are and what we are. Batanguenos do also pay tribute and owe their cultural heritage also by still commemorating the Sublian Festival.

Subli was said to be a traditional worship dance performed as a tribute to the Holy Cross referred as the Mahal Na Poong Santa Cruz. The festival had been an annual celebration for the Batanguenos since July 23, 1988 in honour for the Holy Cross. It was believed that image of the Holy Cross was found during the Spanish rule in the town of Alitagtag and been so historical for the residents. In addition,

The cultural fest is typically commemorated during the Foundation day of Batangas, where partakers and around a thousand students would join, march and perform the Subli Street dancing including Lyceum of the Philippines University and other universities and establishments. They would wear buntal hats and kalasteng buho (bamboo castanets) as dancing implements. The Subli is also performed using abaniko (fan), baso (wine glass) and wide bandannas.

According to its terminology, the word Subli was derived from the words “subsub” meaning to fall with the head and “bali” or broken which reflects its dance steps. Because of it, Filipinos showed how creative they are in composing the dance steps that will eventually replicate the meaning of Subli.

Our cultural dance is one sign of our patriotism in our country. Years by, the new generation will also adopt this very old folk dance, Subli.

Professedly Afraid

Admit it or not, every one of us lied countless times. But there was one scenario came into my life, which continually affects my relationship with my teachers. Those memories are still fresh to my mind, and remembering those times is one of the most painful parts of my life.

It was a sunny morning, but the warmth of the sun couldn’t ease the frigid feeling rushing though my veins. The flash of those minutes as our teacher and principal stepped inside our cosy room was like an alarm of danger. They were coupled by other students who became the witness of my sin. I thought that my heart could pop out through my chest as I estimated the race of my heartbeat. Their voice roared through out the room as they told the most terrible words, “You lied to me, Morales!!!!” he said in tagalog. In that very moment, I felt I was the only person left on that quiet room. No words were able to utter from my lips. I could hear my own breathing as silence embraced that moment. My knees started to shudder, and my hands were trembling, not knowing how I would defend myself. Guilty rushed on my conscience because I know that I made a big violation on the rules of our school. Half alive, I faced our principal and admitted about the cell phone I brought in school even it’s not allowed on school premises. At that very moment, I knew he could slap me into my face but he didn’t. Instead, he told so many words, not minding if it would hurt my feelings. I realized that time that I would rather choose to be physically hurt than to suffer emotionally. The time our principal left, I thought everything was done, but I heard again the aguish words from our adviser. My heart ripped as she told me I didn’t deserve to be on her advising class. Though I was able to fight back my tears, I know my heart was silently weeping. I felt I was alone, as my classmates chose to be mute and speechless. No one decided to comfort me, nor tell anything that would relieve the misery I was in.

I thought that dramatic scene was over, but day by day my adviser seemed like I was the black sheep of the class. She wasn’t considerate. When she checks my paper works, she would crumple the paper and throw it. I think that she wanted to ignore me whenever I call her name, feeling like she’s deaf. I wanted to cry out loud, asking myself why life was so unfair. Even I was very alive, I consider myself that I was in hell.  Why do people always look to all my mistakes and not to others? Until I graduated and gripped my diploma, she still gave me that treatment.

Now, as a college student I’m still afraid to approach my professors. Though they are so approachable, I can’t help but remember my encounter with my past teacher. The memories of the past are so bitter like I never want to happen again. So I choose to be quite all the time whenever there’s a professor around me. Like when it’s class time, I will eventually shake in panic when I see their faces like a terrorist aiming to fire their students. That’s the reason why I prefer to be not in touch with teachers because it would be so unbearable if the experience of yesterday comes along the second time around.

Letting Go

This is the most painful part of growing up, letting go on the person you love and care for years. I guess, I really need to let go him, so I can find myself. I am lost on a paradise which only surrounds loneliness and agony. I feel like he stabbed my heart million times over and over, but still I love him. I know, maybe I’m insane but the love still remains to my heart and I’M willing to wait for him. That maybe in the end, he will be mine again. Though I know I will have a hard time on the process, I know God gave this sudden change to realize that this is a challenge to measure how tight we are. This is the reality.

I know you will not be able to read this, but I want to say that I still love you Jonas Carlo Maligaya. I’ll still wait for you to come back to tell again your sweet endearment to me.  For now I’ll let you go to find myself. That maybe one day, you’ll realize that I am the one you truly love.

Mamhe.. =’(

Allene

She’s everybody’s friend. As I walk closer to her, she would eventually shout my name to call my attention. Even when were not together, I can still smell her sweet scent that stuck through my senses as she flips the perfume bottle spraying all over her body. As I close my eyes, I can still remember her round eyes when she’s amazed and her sweetest smile that can light up a dark town. Surely, boys would love to touch her hand, as if it’s the softest hand you’ll ever touch.

I met her on our first day of class. She stepped confidently inside our room and lingered around to take her seat as my classmates chatting about their high school life. I was the first who approach her so she sited beside me and preferred to be quite a while. As I started to ask her regarding to her past high school experience, I was shocked only to know that my first love was the man she dumped during 3^rd year high. We laughed, as we realized how our lives had been connected. That was the beginning of our friendship.

Though she wears simple shirts, jeans and sneakers, she wear also dresses, “if it’s required”. But one time I saw her in that black silk dress, I was stunned on her transformation from a boyish style to an appealing woman. As of the moment, I want to see her again on dresses and stilettos wearing make-up with gems around her.

Again, she’s everybody’s friend. You’ll love her more like wine when you get the chance to know her better and appreciate who she really are.